Sometimes I feel like there is a part of my brain that is dedicated to Diabetes — thinking about random diabetes-related (even if only slightly) all the time, even while all the other parts of life are going on. Of course, you would never know that given how long it has been since I have written anything on this blog! But, lately I feel like there are so many things on my mind that I can’t seem to settle on any one thing to write about, so here are some brief glimpses at what has been on my diabetes mind lately:
* How can a 0.075 bolus wreak as much havoc as it sometimes does with the Bear’s bg numbers?
* A post I linked to from my Twitter feed about people with disabilities not wanting to (or being able to?) *distance* themselves or *rise above* their disability. Been thinking about it since I read it. Like so many things about diabetes I agree and disagree with it. We (myself & the Bear) are so much more than our diabetes – but the diabetes is an inescapable fact in our lives and colors everything else in one way or another. (Of course, now I can’t find this post – though I found a few similar ones. If you think you know what I’m talking about – I wish I did – please post in the comments!)
* Sleepovers. The Bear is 7 years old and this one is just hanging out there in our future. CGM & pump should help some, but still… Sleepovers.
* How to get a 7-year-old to eat more healthy foods?
* I need to: get my fasting bloodwork done, figure out the strange 1.5 hour of low bgs followed by 6 hours of high bgs that has appeared in the Bear, do better logging in the MySugr app and My Fitness Pal, do real overnight basal testing on the Bear, pay more attention on weekends, test my own bg more (not just rely on CGM), change my lancet, take my antidepressant & antianxiety meds EVERY day, build more of a social support system for the Bear, reschedule the CDE appointment I missed this week, connect with other families in the school district dealing with T1… I’m pretty sure it is this kind of list that keeps me from going to sleep at night.
* I think a lot about running. How it is the best and most consistent exercise I have ever done, how fabulous my running group is and how lucky I feel to have them as friends, how proud I am that I have stuck with it and done 4 5Ks, and how disappointed and discouraged I am with the shin splints that are still such a literal pain. I worry that I’m not getting the right treatment, that the shin splints will never go away or that they will come back if I keep running. I *know* that I need to be patient and give the healing process time to work, but I still worry.
So, there’s the current state of the diabetes mind. Messy, as usual, and lacking a clear path to resolution of most of the above.